Balance.

Today is the Feast Day of St. Monica. Long ago Eric’s scholarship went to various schools when it came time to being distributed in an annual basis. These days it goes to an 8th grade student (or more) from St. Monica’s in Mishawaka, Indiana. This student stands for compassion, holds it firm and ripples it. This student goes into Marian High School their Freshman year. That is the criteria for receiving it.

What a beautiful gift. This gift started the year Eric died and was held down by one family. Now it is held down by many many many friends of Eric. Now it goes to not only 1 incoming freshman of Marian High School but 2. Kevin Stanley has roped it in and is divinely appointed to do so. God showed me him as Mom was dying after her failed colon surgery. It was clear that he was chosen by God to decide all things and handle all things related to this scholarship and the rest of Eric’s friends. For years God had shown me this but it was put into action in the recent years. I am forever grateful for this and I know my Mom was always grateful too.

My Mom always held onto Eric’s friends as they were a great source of comfort to her. They filled her with love when she couldn’t find it.

My Mom wrote a story called The Hole in Me Since the Day You Died and this was carried into existence by a man of Hospice. This was her truth and I am sure any blood related parent, especially a Mother understands the size of this grief. With the greatest empathy for my Mom, I can say that I am thankful this void can now be filled. Watching her pain for 24 years was excruciating. At first I would buy her two presents for holidays. One from me and one from Eric, trying to elevate her. Only God can do that. I did my best to be what she didn’t have anymore. That’s where the grief always came from. Seeing my Mom miss something that I couldn’t help. So why not pour it all into helping the world be a better place and honor Eric. That was how I showed her I carried the cross too.

As Eric always said, Love.

Miss, Eric’s sis